I bet you say “yes” to things because you think you should.
Perhaps to even make someone else happy (which you don’t have the power to do – so stop doing that!)
You say “yes” for the other person while you inwardly cringe and cross off your list something you really did want to do but now you can’t.
What would change if you said NO instead?
- Would you have more time?
- Do more things you actually want to do?
- Feel better about your schedule?
- Get some much needed self-care in?
Think about it this way – when you say “no” to something, you are saying “yes” to something for you.
After all, there is only so much time in a day.
I Don’t Have Enough TIME
This is the biggest complaint I hear: “I don’t have enough time.”
Time is a commodity. It is more precious than money because you can’t get more of it.
You spend a lot of your day saying “yes” to things that take you away from the things you actually wanted to do.
When you say “yes” to your already busy schedule, you either have to take out something you really wanted to do or you lose time for yourself at the end of the day.
But by saying ‘no”, you say yes to that walk, a book, a reasonable bedtime, time to “be” or whatever it is that you want to do for yourself.
See where I’m going with this?
Start Saying “NO”
When someone invites you to do something you DON’T want to do, the best thing you can do is say “no.”
Notice there is no excuse here. You’re not ignoring them or leaving them in limbo. Just say, “No.” Or “No thank you.”
Here’s the thing, no one wants you at something you don’t want to be at. You mess with the vibe of the event. And when you don’t want to be there, everyone knows you don’t want to be there. So save all this trouble and start saying “no.”
It feels awkward at first but I promise it gets easier once you realize what you can do instead during that time!
Most of the time, they don’t care that you said no. (Now if they pressure you once you say you don’t want to go, then you should really look at why they’re trying to pressure you and decide to go from there. Maybe even read this article on boundaries.)
The bonus in saying “no” is that you have more time and energy to actually do things you want to do. Maybe you get to sleep at a decent hour. Or you get to read a book you’ve been wanting to start.
Pause Before You Say “Yes”
Before you say “yes”, ask yourself do I:
- Want to do this?
- Have time to do this?
- Have the energy to do this?
- Have to give up something else I want to do in order to do this?
Don’t respond until you’ve decided if you really want to do it or not – but don’t forget to respond. (Not responding puts a strain on your energy.)
Remember, you get to decide how to spend your time.
Spend your time wisely. Say “no” more often so you can say “yes” to the things you really want to do.
Lisa Gornall is a Spiritual Medium, Healer and Coach. She is also an author, speaker and offers event support.
Lisa uses her intuitive abilities to coach career driven women at or near their breaking point to reset. Get your head, energy and life on point. Let’s get back to that freedom lifestyle you originally envisioned!